Family Treasure
1,2,3,4!
January 2, 1934 was the day James Harvey Baller was born. Happy Birthday Jim!
Who was Jim you ask? Well, he was my mom’s 2nd husband, my stepdad, and my friend. I loved him for all those things.
His sickness and death in 2010 began a period of profound change in my life. Today would have been his 87th birthday and I want to recognize him and what he gave me somehow.
Jim was born on a family farm in Nebraska during the Great Depression and his earliest memories on that farm included radio broadcasts and adult conversations about World War 2. On this farm he watched his own parents work and save. He learned how to help on the farm with tractors, combines and other heavy machinery that he learned to operate, maintain and repair at a young age. After graduating from his high school class of 12 he went to college to study physics heading the call so many young Americans felt to serve their country in the Cold War. His early years as an engineer involved helping design some of the launch apparatus for Viking Space Rockets and he ended his career as the Director of the cruise missile system here in St. Louis.
His early life experiences growing up on a farm in Nebraska in the shadows of The Great Depression and World War 2 shaped his life and that echoed through lessons to my own.
Jim came into my life when I was a teenager. As I was finishing high school he was preparing to retire and he would successfully do so at the age of 55. Teenage Carlo wasn’t impressed because 55 seemed old but over the years I’ve come to respect some of his philosophies that made that dream of his possible. (below is Jim and my mom Rosella at his retirement party)
Jim never would have called himself an environmentalist but his practicality and and engineer brain embodied the first two R’s of Reduce and Reuse in a way that many folks today who only focus on the Recycle part miss entirely to the detriment of their stated goals. The scars of the depression made that generation very focused on making do with what one has. To not waste. To fix things that are broken. That functionality of a thing was prime.
I doubt he ever read Thoreau, but he absolutely embodied “I make myself rich by making my wants few”. The simplest things made the best gifts for him for birthdays and holiday. A bag of M&M’s gave him a smile like you see from a child. A new pair of gloves or a flannel shirt that he wouldn’t have bought himself made him happy. He wants were so few the smallest things brought him joy. One year my mom got him a tall craftsman tool box because, even though he was constantly using tools to repair and work on things he never would have spent so much on a a big tool box when he had tons of small ones he had gathered over the years. He absolutely loved it and it’s one of his things that I still have to keep my tools in and remember him by.
We didn’t have many direct conversation about money growing up, but I learned a practical way of looking at money through examples he and my mom set that would shape my life forever. I didn’t adopt all of them, but they are with me and I am grateful for that.
Aside from financial lessons I learned from him, he also taught me so much about working things and fixing thigs. With Jim I helped build our back yard shed, replace the engine and transmission in my car, do body work on my car and once I got a house of my own he was my answer man. Once the power went out on my street from my house and all the houses west of me. It was winter time and my furnace was gas. I called Jim and over the phone he helped me wire electricity from my neighbors house to my furnace so we could heat the home! I felt like MacGyver! I’ll never be great at any of those things, but he taught me not to be afraid to try. And today with a million how to videos available on Youtube, I still use those skill. I’ve saved 10’s of thousands of dollars over the years by being able to do projects because of the example and foundation Jim gave to me. (below is one of the many times Jim and I spent cold evenings and weekends fixing my car. This photo is from an album my mom made me when I turned 30 and you can see a bit of her personality with this example of captions she added. :-) )
Today is his birthday. He is on my mind and the impact he had on my life is profound and for that I’m grateful. He was quiet, kind, thoughtful and patient. I think about how much impact his life examples had on my life as I try to be a good example for my own sons.
Call to action:
Think about the people in your life that impacted your thinking and actions. Really look at it as objectively as you can to take the lesson in. If they are alive, tell them. It will mean more to them than anything else you could give me and you’ll never regret it. If they aren’t here just being aware of why we do or think certain things can help us be more intentional about What we are doing. Sharing those lessons, memories and lessons with your kids or grandkids is a precious gift and real treasure for every family.
Happy Birthday Jim.
Love,
Carlo